This Father’s Day

My Father: A Larger Than Life Anchor

Both of my kids were awful sleepers as babies – like an hour here, 15 minutes there – then they were ON until the next 10-minute nap.  I learned that playing music in their room at night was KEY to keeping them asleep.  So – every night I would put my phone on silent, put it under my son’s crib, and play whatever “baby night-night” playlist I could find.  One morning when my son was a year and a half old,  I went into his room around 6 am, as I did each morning,  and saw that I had over 40 missed calls. My brother, my sister, and my stepmom had called over and over and over again – all night.  My stomach was in my throat, I was sweating and already in a total panic.  I knew that from this day forward my life would be forever changed.

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My Father: A Man Of Adventure

A few months prior, my Dad took his annual motorcycle trip from his house in Northern California to our house near Dallas, TX.  I was always touched that he made such an effort to include our little family in his rounds as we were much farther south than anyone else he’d visit.  I was especially looking forward to this visit because my son was just over a year old and past the “new baby” stage and was walking, interacting, laughing (NOT sleeping….) and I was excited to see my Dad and my son hang out.  My Dad was NOT a ‘baby-little kid-young kid’ kind of Dad.  His very dry sense of humor was lost on anyone under the age of, say, 25-ish.  While he’d be cracking up at some joke he’d made undoubtedly geopolitical in nature or so sly-to-the-inside for you baseball fans – us kids would be staring at him uncomfortably not knowing if he was laughing WITH or AT us – or neither.  As an adult, I thought him to be one of the most clever, sarcastic, funny without being overtly so, people I knew – and he cracked.  Me.  Up.

My Dad retired when he was 46.  Yup.  He’d become a scratch golfer, an A tennis player, had ridden his bike from Oregon to Virginia – twice (like, peddled…no motor but himself), hiked the highest mountain peaks, built an igloo to camp in (who does that???), and was a beautiful snow skier – any mountain, any weather, any time.  

That trip to TX – when he and my son hung out?  That would be the last time I would ever see my Dad.  I was always melancholy watching him gear up to head out to his next destination – but that last trip as I watched him ride out of the driveway and down our tree-lined street, I sat down right where I was and cried.  I didn’t know why, something felt different.  The world seemed to stop and allow me a moment to just be inside myself and appreciate the entirety of the 43 years I’d shared with him.

This Father’s Day, Hug, Laugh, Listen

You see – the 40 missed calls – they were to tell me that in an instant – quite literally less than 1 second, my Dad was gone. My stepmom had poked her head in his den and asked if he wanted dessert.  He OF COURSE said yes – she came back a moment later and he was gone.  Just like that.  This larger than life, anchor to safety, adventurous, laugh that would shake a room, my Dad – so softly, quietly, personally – was gone.

This Father’s Day – as you receive invitations to the BBQ’s, brunches, Zoom calls – say yes.  Call, don’t text.  Hug, laugh, listen.  Be present.  Take the time.  Get to know him.  Trust me on this one – you’ll be glad you did.

Enjoyed this article? Read another Momma Blog on First Time Fears – Leaving Dad Alone with Baby.

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Proud Momma is the voice of a regular mom trying her best to survive this regular mom life.

2 weeks ago
I'm a Proud Momma

For real. I was going to jump rope too but had to tap out. #ImAProudMomma #oldmom ... See MoreSee Less

For real.  I was going to jump rope too but had to tap out. #ImAProudMomma #oldmom

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I can relate! 😂


Is it over yet?
#MomsBeLike #SummerBreakWithKids #ImAProudMomma

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The bubbles! I get so tired of the bubbles 😩😂

I remember those days!

Sara Holt Bumpas. Is this you?? 🤣😂

Megan Rachel Tuff how you holding up?

Kelly Doumen still standing

Christina Moore

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NK Burlak 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

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1 month ago
I'm a Proud Momma

True story. I've yet to see my siblings laugh so hard. #ImAProudMomma ... See MoreSee Less

True story.  Ive yet to see my siblings laugh so hard. #ImAProudMomma

Comment on Facebook

My son did cut my daughter's hair - and his own....

My kid’s haircut. He was so proud that I couldn’t be mad. All I could do was laugh. 🤣

This looks like a cut my daughter gave herself once! 🤣

Lashae Mcardle this reminds me of a certain little girl...🤔💓😂

My daughter had the most beautiful curls. I was always afraid to introduce her to scissors. Well her Parents as teachers lady gave her a lesson on using scissors. The rest is history. New haircut it was. But the curls came back thicker and curlier than ever.

Yaqa Nicolai remember when we both rolled into kindergarten one day and we both had little bangs 🤣🤣🤣

Brother you cutting my hair when we were little! Jorge Soria 🤣🤣

I did that when I was little

Maria when April cut your hair when you were small😂

Remember when Savannah took the electric shaver to her head that time when she was 5 yrs. Old LOL Taylor Jones Jeremiah Duncan

Shannon Gilliland remember when I cut your bangs but got them way to short lol 😂

Alex Lauver Josie Sue never forget the legendary “mohawk” right after getting a hair cut 😂😂😂

O my god you and Lisa 😄 🤣

Gabrielle Angela This is soooo your sister!!!

Hahaha....she grew them back

God Bless

Riley Michelle This is Gavin trying to help you out when he was 4😂😂😂

Lisa Heck what gizmo looks like after the groomers lol

My sister didn’t dare

Rachel Watson couldn’t help but laugh and thought of Mia straight away lol x

That so cute 🥰

*middle school* Lyssa Rarick 😂😂

My sister didn’t dare

You just had this convo with shay Juanita

Natalie CoxKassy Michelle MooreCamille CoxHaley McMillonCharles WillsonSandra Preston WillsonSharon Cox looks just like Natalie!!

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